It's no secret that my spiritual life isn't where I want it to be. I'm always wanting to make it better. Which is a good think, I think. I think one of my stumbling blocks to God is accepting a Father's love. I grew up without a dad. The main fatherly image I had growing up was my grandfather. It was amazing but lets' fact it--when I was ten years old (which is how old my son is now) my grandfather was over seventy years old. So, I know how to give a "Father's love" but accepting it is another thing. It's different. So, I'm sitting in mass thinking, "Mary . . . Our Blessed Mother . . . wait a minute . . . Mary was a girl!!" This may not be a brilliant revelation for the rest of you and the fact that the Mother of God is a female wasn't really for me either. But since I never really had much of a masculine influence in my life, I have always had a special connection with women. Women have had more of an influence on me than men. I've always had more female friends than men. In fact, I was telling my wife about reconnecting with my best friend from high school a couple of months ago on Facebook. Her question was, "What's her name?"
So, the church teaches us about Mary and about how she can be such a positive role model for us in growing closer to her son. I'm looking for a better relationship with Jesus. I connect better with women. Why WOULDN'T I use Mary to help me grow closer to Jesus?? I thought to myself, "What a brilliant idea!" And then I felt like an idiot because it took me so long to figure it out. It's not like the church doesn't put a special emphasis on Mary. She isn't some secret devotion. Heck, every time I go to confession, Msgr. Blacet tells me that when I'm faced with temptation I should ask for Mary's intercession. I've repeatedly been told she will help me. Sometimes I'm not as smart as I think I am.
I am going to start going to Mary for help. I'm going to ask her to pray for me when I'm tempted. I even have a special intention that I'm going to lay at her feet for her assistance. I'm going to ask her to teach me more about Jesus and to pray for me that I may be pleasing to him. That way, as Msgr Blacet told me, when I get to Heaven I can tell Mary that it's her fault that I'm there.